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“Out beyond rightness or wrongness, there is a field. I will meet you there.” -   Rumi, 13th century Persian poet   While the title of this post makes a nice, short headline, the question could be better stated, “Why do couples’ fights become so heated and painful?” and “Is there...

In the 1970s, the divorce rate in the United States rose to 50% and that is where it has hovered for the last 40 years. Many marriage researchers report that marriage today has more pressure on it than ever before. Partners today expect their...

Marriage education needs a little humor. Seriously folks, considering printing out this list and posting it somewhere you'll see it regularly. Marriage needs reminders.   Thou shall practice daily acts of caring and kindness Thou shall not criticize blame...

[caption id="attachment_696" align="alignright" width="325"] Marriage education deepens your understanding of many aspects of your partner[/caption] For young couples, the thrill of engagement and wedding preparations can overshadow an important fact: on the other side of the honeymoon, life as usual...

Overcoming the Tricky Issues around Asking for Love and Caring Behaviors [caption id="attachment_1328" align="aligncenter" width="528"] Asking expressly for the caring behaviors you desire can be a relief to your partner.[/caption] As many of you know, Debbie Seid and I held a Valentine’s Day weekend workshop entitled, “The...

Easy connection can be yours when you communicate intentionally rather than competitively. Everyone wants a safe connection and most are baffled that it’s so difficult to achieve. My previous post, “3 Reasons Typical Couples’ Communication Stinks,” covered just why so many couples feel they...

[caption id="attachment_1828" align="alignright" width="300"] AAArrrrrgggghhhh[/caption] Dialogue is typically defined as an exchange of ideas or opinions on a particular issue. The problem with that definition is, in relationships people often aren’t really listening to each other, and so ideas aren’t truly “exchanged.” Unfortunately, partners who...